Trust in the Lord!!!!
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on our own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make our paths straight.
We are finishing up our last year here at the seminary, my youngest child, my baby, is 18, he is graduating and heading off to River Forest. We got our first call and already the local churches are contacting me to help them set up and run a ministry for the elderly. Wow after a year of waiting and wondering life is unfolding quickly and I am a little apprehensive. Do I trust the Lord? Well I say I do, then why am I so apprehensive. When people asked me about my call being pending I tell them not to worry, that I will get my gold patch,(for those who don't know what I mean, I mean I will get consecrated and become a real live official deaconess.) And here we go, hold on, why am I scared. Would I be human if I were not??
For my year of waiting the Lord placed me in a perfect environment. He gave me a part-time job as a secretary at a local church that has had turmoil almost tear their church apart. Yet to the astonishment of Satan, this church pulled together and rallied around their new Pastor and is enduring and getting ready to celebrate their 120th anniversary. Go God!!
He also gave me a PRN chaplain job that has blossomed into me also facilitating a grief group. I have learned how to set back and let the group run it self while figuring out when it is time to interfere and guide the group back to the subject at hand. Their grief.
The year before God placed me in an environment where I was enabled to heal, most of my invisible wounds from my past, and integrate my youth into my adulthood and my ministry for the Lord. I was able to learn what my gifts are and how to use them. If it were not for Rev. Scheer and Rev. Hanksmeyer I would not be the fighting force for God that I am today.
Ok with all this said, am I not prepared?? With one of the best educations a LCMS Lutheran can ask for, after all I studied everything my husband studied, except for the languages, and now with all this practical experience I should be bold. I should be able to trust the Lord is making my path straight. And I am going where He wants me to be. I am truly being called!!
Trust in the Lord and lean not on your own understanding. Oh wait that is what I am doing, I am adding up everything I have done to prepare myself for the Lord's Ministry and forgetting to just trust that this is what is suppose to be and let it happen. I am such a control freak!!
It is hard isn't it, to just let go and let God. I have to put my hand in there and try to guide my life so I can feel like I am in control. But I'm not the one in control am I???
Ok in all my ways I will pray for the Lord to help me to acknowledge Him so that He can make my path straight.
