A wise woman one said, "Gifts that God gives a person and fruits of the spirit are not the same thing." This made me wonder what the difference between the two were. I speak about the gifts God gave me in a different blog and that is what I understand gifts from God to be. I found an article that talked about the Fruits of the Spirit being The Nine Biblical Attributes which are named as: Love, Joy, Peace, Long suffering (patience), Peace, Gentleness (kindness), Goodness, Faith (faithfulness), Meekness and Temperance (self-control.)
Galatians 5:22-26
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.
I have learned that a huge part of being a theological student is reflection. With reflection I am able to consider what it is that God is wanting for me. Through study of His word I can look at my actions through what God expects of me, instead of my selfish, self-centered motives.
When I think of love I think of 1 Corinthians 13:4-8,
" 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails."
This last couple of weeks I got to reflect on the love I have for my husband and the fact that I did not know that I could love anyone, except my children, this much. When I was faced with his mortality and had to think of a possible future without him, my heart broke. In that moment I could not remember one thing that this man has ever done wrong. He is my prince. We together walk with God as our King. In God we place our hopes, our trusts, and through Christ we persevere. Now as I watch him sleep, I praise God for the eleven years he has given me with this man, and pray he gives us another forty. When I look at him I see Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, kindness, goodness, meekness, and temperance, and with him together we share our faith. This is still selfish and rotates around my needs. Ok.
1 John 4:19-20
19 We love because He first loved us. 20 Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen.
Much harder to do because with my husband we are so much alike I am sure God had me in mind when he made Chris, or maybe it is the other way around since he is older. Yet to love all other children of God, wow that is hard. I'm to love the people I have nothing in common with, I am to love the ones who misuse the word of Christ to benefit themselves? I am to love the ones who are not pleasant to be around? I am to love the ones who are so arrogant? I am to love the mean man in the other bed who acts ugly to the nurses, his visitors and plays his T.V. so loud that you can hear it three rooms away? Yes, Yes I am, and why because God loved me first. Weeelll I must first remind myself that love is not rude, love is not easily angered, Yes but anger is the first feeling I usually feel no matter the circumstance. Ugh!
Now, I remember all feelings are valid. People do not have "good" or "bad" feelings, they have feelings they have when their needs are being met and feelings they have when their needs are not being met. Ok, I am feeling angry because I feel this man is being rude, because he does not seem to me to be considering others in the room. What do I need? I need him to play his T.V. where only he can hear it. Or maybe I just need my husband to be able to sleep. Ok. Now what. As my husband's roommate takes and hour and a half shower, I tell the nurse who checks on us that I bought Chris earplugs yet once we put them in we are still able to hear the T.V. of his roommate as if it is still blaring and my husband is unable to sleep. The nurse turns down the TV, over and over. Later that evening they moved my wonderful, gentle, non-complaining husband to a private room. Prayers answered. Why am I still mad? This young man is still a child of God whether he realizes it or not. Yep loving others even in their sin, the way God loves me in my sin, HARD!!!!
I do remember though that God loves me in-spite of who I am. Thanks be to God, and I will continue to try to love my neighbor.
